Thursday, 8 September 2011

The Weather

In traditional weather forcasting style, I'll first tell you what the weather has been like these past few weeks here in the LTS household.

We have had Hurricanes. Yes hurricanes. Not as bad a Irene of course, or even as bad as our storm of '87, but hurricanes we have had.
They have taken the form of huge Epileptic seizures. Emergencys no less. They've torn through the house, and sent us scattering for help.

We've had tornados. Temper tantrum tornadoes. They've come in the form of a 12 year old girl wanting to behave like a 22year old, and stressed up parents putting they're foot down, and trying to explain why certain things can't be done at the age of 12years old -I mean if you do everything at the age of 12, there won't be anything left to do when you get to 15 or 18 or 22 will there? ;o)

Then we've had rain. Oh you should have seen the rain. Torrential it was. The tears poured out
I so wished I was someone else, or anywhere else. Blogland even. Yes, I would like to have been in Blogosphere. You know, right out there. Then I could have popped into all my favourite blogs, and been someone else. Just for a day. A change. A rest.
I was jealous of everyone and anyone. Why me? Why my daughter? Why us?...Why NOT us?
Just to be 'normal'. No epilepsy. No migraines.  Oh bliss.

Then the Fog. Cold, drizzly fog. Came in the form of Migraines. One on top of the other. You know the type, hiding under the duvet. Nausea, vomiting, sledgehammer on the back of your head. Having to get up to tend to a epilptic seizure whilst the sledgehammer doesn't stop hitting you, and you haven't been able to have so much as a sip of water past your lips in two days as the minute you do you vomit. Urgh.
And the guilt. Yes, the guilt that  your eldest daughter is having a huge amount of seizures, and your husband is trying (and succeeding-brilliant lovely husband) to cope with them, and the youngest two whilst his wife is ill in bed. The youngest two keep creeping in just to make sure you haven't died. 'Cos the last time they saw you after listening to you vomit in the bathroom, you came out looking half dead. So they're just checking.

Then. At last. The calm.
Seizures partly back to usual. Still every day and night, but not every 10 or 15 minutes.
The tantrums subsiding. Back to school. Can be grown up with friends.
The migraines.  Finished for a couple of weeks hopefully. A reprieve.
For now.

Now the forcast for the weeks ahead.
More Seizures will happen. You know they are complicated. You know that she has an extremely hard Epilepsy to treat. That's life.
More migraines will happen. They have done since you were 17 and theres no reason why they should stop now.
More growing up will be done. She's only 12. Give her a break. They're only young once.
Take things steadily and calmly, and you'll get through it.

Remember when you're under the duvet that your migraine likes to make you feel bad. It feeds off the great waves of sadness that come from you when all this is happening.
And most importantly, feeling sorry for yourself does NOT help.

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and carry on.

If you've read this far lovely people, have a great weekend.
Normal blogging will resume soon with some new crafty items to show as well.

Take care lovely people.
Love Donna xx
All out the garden :o)


  1. I am so sorry Donna that you are having such a rotten time at the moment. It is horrible when everything just piles in on top of you and you don't know which way to turn. Sometimes it can be very difficult to pick yourself up and dust yourself off. I really hope your daughter is on the mend and remember do drop me a line if you need to talk. It is a shame we live so far apart. Take care.
    Jo xx

  2. Oh, dear Donna
    I feel for you reading this post. I have had to deal with illness in the family all my life as Mr.T has had a rough ride over the years so I sort of know what its like.
    Trying to keep a family together when times are rough is very, very, hard and if you are generally a tough person people think you can cope with anything.
    Your post today is wonderful and cathartic for you as you have emptied your heart and I know you must now feel at least a little bit better.

    I have something for you to make you feel better, but have lost your address, email it to me and I will send it to you.

    Love Briony

  3. Dearest Donna~
    I don't think I've ever read a blog post that expressed such honest and open emotion. My heart goes out to you and your family for what you have been going through. Thank you for your courage and generosity in sharing these feelings, and thank you for all you do every day to care so much for others. Sending a big, big hug your way, and hoping you have a nice, quiet Donna day today!!! xoxoxoxoxo
    Loads of love~ Jennie

  4. Ohh Donna - Lots and lots of (((hugggs)). Your post is so wonderfully honest and I feel privileged that you have shared your troubles with us your friends in blogland. I can only send words of support, and sometimes I feel I am not very good at expressing such things - but you have often left such uplifting and supportive comments on my blog that I feel you deserve no less in return. Your family sound strong and resilient and I am sure that together you will get through the tough times. Love and best wishes. Linda xxx

  5. Donna, I'm so sorry the last few weeks have been so tough for you. I hope things pick up for you and your family very shortly.

    Take care and have a good weekend (the weather forecast is more favourable!)
    Best wishes x x

  6. Love your analogy, Donna. Just when I think I can't handle any more, I hear someone else's story. It certainly puts things in perspective. I've had my share of bad luck, health issues, etc. And yet we do keep going. I know they say what won't kill you will make you strong, but sometimes it's just so darned hard to believe that. A big juicy hug from across the pond. You're not alone, even though it feels that way right now. And you know what--I say go ahead and feel sorry for yourself. Why not? We all need to do that sometimes. Sometimes it helps. Have a good cry, feel sorry for yourself. The storm will die down. Lots of love, Victoria

  7. Donna - I am sorry that you have been having such a tough time. Its hard enough to deal with truly awful migraines without having to to contend with caring for your daughter.

    I hope there is a period of calm for you all xx


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